After hours of prayer, discussion with my family and friends, and in the belief that this is my best opportunity ever to run for Congress; I have decided to run for Congress to represent Alabama’s Eighth District!
My friends, while I don’t encourage you to run against me, there are open seats available in these Alabama Congressional Districts: 8th, 9th, 12th, and 19th (just perfect for someone who likes golf!).
So far I’ve only got one issue: accountability. I believe that when the government spends money taken from us through taxes and borrowed from our children and grandchildren, that we the people deserve to know where that money is spent. Not only that, we deserve to know that the government is spending that money wisely.
For example, in Alabama’s 8th District, President Obama says he spent $366,480 of stimulus money, but Obama didn’t save or create a single job – that’s right – zero.
My friends, I can do better than that. I promise that if elected, I will stop spending REAL borrowed money on non-existent jobs in bogus Districts. Vote for Reactionary to represent Alabama’s 8th District.
UPDATE: Danny notes that “getting qualified voters to turn out” may be difficult
I believe that my GOTV efforts will carry the mock election day. As a pseudonymous candidate for a bogus seat, I plan to run a virtual campaign. While my esteemed opponent Susan Fillipelli has great strength within the Twitter community, I believe that my Facebook friends will turn out for me.