A reminder that elections do have consequences

Please indulge me as I rant…

I had to renew my drivers license recently and since I had LASIK surgery* a few years ago I figured it was as good a time as any to get the corrective lens restriction removed.  I anticipated a painful process at the License Department and my suspicion was justified.

Before I make the trek to the License Department satellite office I went to the website to see what it said about the corrective lens restriction.  Nothing.  So I went to the office at the soon-to-be-closed Southern Family Market on Hwy. 72.  About two dozen people were waiting in the License Department lines, evenly divided between licenses and tags.  I stood there for the better part of an hour watching the Tax Assessor employee sitting idle, reading what appeared to be a magazine.  Back in 2008 voters had the opportunity to elect candidates who wanted to cross train employees from those departments so tax dollars weren’t wasted paying some of them to paint their fingernails while customers stood in lines.  They were unglamorous, down ballot races that received scant attention compared to high profile races that year and the incumbents won.  The consequence is continued long wait times for service.

Once I get to the front of the line I’m told that they aren’t able to remove the restriction.  I would have to go to the state operated license office for that critical service.  Never mind that I could plainly read distant signs with small lettering.  After giving up a good portion of my work day to drive to the office and stand in line I wasn’t exactly eager to drive all the way to Church St.  I started to just renew my license with the restriction in place rather than go through the hassle, but I relented to badgering from the staff about being fined if pulled over with the restriction and no glasses or contacts.  So I went down to the Church St. office.

At the Church St. office I entered the line for the attendant who sends people on to other lines.  After a fifteen minute wait the lady was nice enough to hand me a vision test form that I must have completed by a doctor.  Why the county office couldn’t hand me that form without making me stand in line I do not know (or better yet, why not put it online?!).  At this point I’m pretty displeased with the process, but I dutifully schedule an appointment with my doctor and go in the following week for my vision test (still 20-15).  The receptionist informed me that the state won’t even let them keep copies of the form; you have to go to the license office just to get it.

Armed with my completed vision form and, after a stop at the ATM, the requisite cash for paying the license fee (the county only accepts cash or check after all) I make my way back to the state license office, which is also referred to as “prison lite.”  After waiting in the pre-line I’m directed to a row of chairs that serves as the line for those renewing licenses.  There are rules in this line.  Literally!  They actually hand out cards providing instructions on how lines work just in case this is your first time venturing out into civilized society.

A stern lady paced behind the row of chairs sharply rebuking anyone with the gall to drink, talk, or leave an empty chair between him and the next person in line.

When I was finally “next” I walked over to the waiting clerk and presented my vision test documentation, signed by my doctor.  And what did she ask me to do next?  You guessed it, she asked me to look into the eye test machine and read the letters!  What was the point of sending me to the doctor for an official test if they’re only going to make me re-do it?!  I passed the test, finished up, and when it came time to pay I was informed that they strongly preferred debit or credit cards and may not be able to make change for cash.  Considering I made a special stop to get cash in anticipation of not being able to use my debit card it seemed a rather fitting conclusion to the entire process.

*BTW, if you need LASIK then I highly recommend Dr. William Mitchell at Huntsville Laser Center.  Both my wife and I went there and have 20-15 vision.  Great, professional service.