Reactionary for Congress

2009 November 23
by Reactionary

After hours of prayer, discussion with my family and friends, and in the belief that this is my best opportunity ever to run for Congress;  I have decided to run for Congress to represent Alabama’s Eighth District!

My friends, while I don’t encourage you to run against me, there are open seats available in these Alabama Congressional Districts:  8th,  9th,  12th,  and 19th  (just perfect for someone who likes golf!).

So far I’ve only got one issue:  accountability.  I believe that when the government spends money taken from us through taxes and borrowed from our children and grandchildren, that we the people deserve to know where that money is spent.  Not only that, we deserve to know that the government is spending that money wisely.   

For example, in Alabama’s 8th District, President Obama says he spent $366,480 of stimulus money, but Obama didn’t save or create a single job – that’s right – zero.

My friends, I can do better than that. I promise that if elected, I will stop spending REAL borrowed money on non-existent jobs in bogus Districts.  Vote for Reactionary to represent Alabama’s 8th District.

UPDATE:   Danny notes that “getting qualified voters to turn out”  may be difficult :)
I believe that my GOTV efforts will carry the mock election day.  As a pseudonymous candidate for a bogus seat, I plan to run a virtual campaign.  While my esteemed opponent Susan Fillipelli has great strength within the Twitter community, I believe that my Facebook friends will turn out for me.

17 Responses leave one →
  1. Bluedog on November 23, 2009 at 11:28 am permalink

    Run rudolph run

  2. Susan Fillippeli on November 23, 2009 at 11:31 am permalink

    I declared my candidacy for Alabama’s 8th CD last week. My campaign was off to a rousing start to with my promises of no taxes, 3 extra hours of sunshine each day and jobs with 6 figure salaries for every resident of the 8th CD. Unfortunately, the Obama administration, has now decided to trample the rights of the citizens of Alabama’s 8th CD by denying them representation. He did the same for residents of districts 9-19 as well.

    It’s too bad, I would have enjoyed our campaign!

  3. Reactionary on November 23, 2009 at 12:53 pm permalink

    Susan ;)

    No taxes? Ronald Reagan and I believe in the Constitution – the Government has certain duties and the function of taxes is to pay for that (and nothing else).

    How can you stand with Al Gore on the subject of geo-engineering earth’s climate? Adding 3 extra hours of sunshine each day will have unintended consequences. For example, without a certain number of cold nights, apple trees can’t set their fruit. What have you got against apples? Don’t you believe that THE CHILDREN should have nutritious food available to them?

    IIRC you used to be opposed to raising the minimum wage. Now you propose to raise the minimum wage. Flip / flop?

    My friends, I’ve proposed a common sense theme for this campaign: “stop spending REAL borrowed money on non-existent jobs in bogus Districts”.

    Note: if you have trouble registering to vote in the 8th District, call ACORN – they’ve got a track record of fixing things like that…

  4. Susan Fillippeli on November 23, 2009 at 2:34 pm permalink

    Reactionary–

    Yes the government has the responsibility to pay for these things, but not me. All these services should be completely and absolutely free to the people.

    As for the sunshine, Al Gore and I stand together on this because it is man, not nature that affects the earth’s temperature. The sun could shine for 24 hours a day and not raise the temp of the earth by even 1/10 a degree, but driving your SUV one mile condemns us all to global warming hell. The little apples will be quite fine.

    Don’t misunderestimate the power of Twitter. The grassroots and nutroots working together to create an Obamanation!

  5. Jonathan on November 23, 2009 at 2:45 pm permalink

    Wow – I want to run for district 12 (I like that number). Since it’s an imaginary district – does the Hatch Act still apply?

  6. Reactionary on November 23, 2009 at 3:33 pm permalink

    Vincent Dickens announced at his Facebook page that he’s running for Congressional District 9!

  7. CJ on November 23, 2009 at 5:48 pm permalink

    You’ve got six of my votes. I live in the 8th CD from about midnight-6am Sunday through Thursday.

  8. Mike Ball on November 23, 2009 at 6:30 pm permalink

    It’s gonna be a tight race. The latest poll for the Republican Primary in the 8th CD Race has Reactionary 50%, Susan 50%, and Undecided 50%

    • Douglas Meeks on November 23, 2009 at 7:34 pm permalink

      “Undecided 50%” obviously the Maple Hill vote …. If you don’t get that turn in your Alabama residency card

      dcm

  9. Dale Jackson on November 23, 2009 at 7:18 pm permalink

    I had a few beers with Reactionary on Saturday and I have some dirt that will sink his campaign. I will sell it to the highest bidder.

  10. old prosecutor on November 23, 2009 at 9:16 pm permalink

    Who is offering free health care and who is for lowering the retirement age to 25? Answer carefully, my 3 votes are at stake here

  11. Reactionary on November 23, 2009 at 11:16 pm permalink

    Dale – being seen with you in public could sink my campaign…

  12. Susan Fillippeli on November 24, 2009 at 7:24 am permalink

    OP–only 3 votes? I’m sending some ACORN reps to your house. We can do much better than that.

  13. dan t on November 24, 2009 at 9:34 am permalink

    Reactionary Ive got bad news. Wendy Halloran found an old videotape of you buckdancing in a thong out in Ardmore at the Boobie Bungalow and she’s going to show it tonight on the news. Quick word of advice, when she calls you later today asking for a comment just do what the Don does and blame it on Karl Rove.

  14. Vince D on November 24, 2009 at 10:29 am permalink

    This all is too hilarious! The intentional fabrication of congressional districts nationwide is of course rediculously sad however it makes for some fun comments like these!

    Have you heard about the Phantom Congress Movement? Some people are taking this somewhat seriously to make a point.

    http://www.redstate.com/moe_lane/2009/11/23/meet-grant-bosse-cand-nh-00/

    • Professor Tom on December 2, 2009 at 2:48 pm permalink

      Thanks for the link. Tea Parties should get active in the Phantom Congress.

  15. Professor Tom on December 2, 2009 at 2:44 pm permalink

    So I’ve been living under a rock for the past three weeks and am catching up on my subs. When you announced your candidacy for AL-8, my first thought was “WTF?” followed by “Jay must be running for State House. As I continued reading the comments, it was CJ that made me aware of what was really going on in this post. Good work.

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